Don’t say sorry, Congratulate me.

Once upon a time there was a girl who got married then got divorced. The end.

–Wait– theres more to that story I know it…oh yes, now i remember.

She was in love–or so she thought..well maybe she wanted to be in love. So bad she just about endured the worst years she has ever had. Verbal abuse was something very common in this marriage. One Valentine’s Day she come home to a messy house and no hurt her feelings and made her cry. He looked at her while she was crying and said,

“oh is your life really that bad?!”

and walked away. No, “I’m so sorry” “Let me make it up to you” Nothing.

He made her feel like crap every day. He would go through her phone on a daily basis, asked who she was talking to. If she was having a conversation with a man he would accuse her of cheating. Even having a conversation with his own brothers…he would tell her talking with them was inappropriate. But they way he would say it was so harsh…”Oh thats cool why don’t you sleep with him already” What would compel a grown man to say such vulgar things? Nonetheless, she felt trapped.

Whenever she told him she was leaving he would say,

“Good luck, nobody will ever want you. You’re trash”

He would say it so many times she began believing him. She stopped talking to her friends because he told her they were bad people and told her her relationship with her family was inappropriate. She began to feel as if she was on auto pilot.

He went away for a few months on a military training. He’d never return her call or texts. Tell her his phone died…yadda yadda yadda. So one day she checked the phone bill and there, number after number, text after text, where proof that he’d be lying and avoiding her. So she called that number and asked what was going on, I girl answered and she knew right away that he was having an affair. Weeks pass and he comes home and she confronts him and he denies it, and actually turns it around and gets mad at her for going through their phone records. She was so stupid and so desperate not to be alone she let it go.

Till he left again. She found proof of an online affair and she confronted him yet again about it. And he again got mad at her for going through his things.

Now i know what you’re thinking, she should have left for the door as soon as possible. But she was stuck. She was so emotionally damaged that she was afraid of the world.

Till one day he came home and admitted he had an affair the most current time he left and all the others before.

She did not shed one. single. tear. 

Instead, she packed her bags and asked for a divorce. She was no longer afraid of the world. She realized she was worthy of love and happiness and no matter how many mistakes she made, she was going to be happy and to be loved properly.

Good thing she did realize that. Because eventually she met an amazing man. A man so wonderful, he made every single bad memory disappear.

“Even in the Darkest of Nights, the Stars Still Shine Bright”

Good thing I kept looking at the stars.




10 thoughts on “Don’t say sorry, Congratulate me.

  1. Reblogged this on divorced doodling and commented:
    Beautifully honest blog post that I want to share with my readers.
    Sometimes we are so stuck that we can’t move despite all the evidence to the contrary. Glad this story has a happy ending.

  2. This is an absolutely lovely post about overcoming one’s self doubts and building a new life. I’ve re blogged it for my readers to enjoy. Thanks.

  3. I can totally relate. I’m going through a divorce right now…where he walked out on my and our daughter and cut us completely off (funds and everything). I’ve had many of those “Valentine’s Days,” but I too am determined to be strong and positive. And now I have my Luke–sweet, wonderful, loving…a REAL man! I’m going to follow your blog and look forward to getting to know you. 🙂

  4. I am touched by your writing your story. It will help others who don’t realize their worth. It is so sad that someone can make you feel that way, but I am so glad you realized you were abused by those harsh words and treatment. Glad you have found happiness again, but most importantly, glad you are happy with YOU the way you are.

  5. This is so inspiring and wonderful to hear you are at last happy. Sharing these experiences is a powerful way of helping to move on, step by step to the life we deserve. Thank you

    • Thank you, I am really happy! It took me awhile to write about this since I didn’t want to talk about him. I felt like he didn’t deserve another second of my life, but this was MY memory and it had to be told. 🙂

  6. Such stories should be shared so those who are still not sure about what they are facing and how they can deal with it find they are not the first or the only ones dealing with abuse. And there is life after divorce.

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